For months I trained in the art of increased body and mind awareness, with the purpose of having a blissful and empowered birth. I read, I practiced, I filled my mind with positive content that would allow me to see birth as the most beautiful experience of my life. Finally, birthing day arrived! After 4 hours of easy control of what they call pain, I hit the panic threshold. The meditation technique that was so effective was not working any more. The kind and empowering words of my partner were not working anymore. My own self belief was vanishing. I hit the panic threshold.
Few days after the birth, I wanted to make sense of what happened. I see the birthing experience as a powerful spiritual boot camp. And as you know, I see heart centered entrepreneurship also as a spiritual boot camp. So, it was quite easy to start drawing parallels between both. The most remarkable common element is indeed: the panic threshold.
The unequivocal symptom of the panic threshold is the thought “I cannot do this”. I see this repeated as fractals in many instances of entrepreneurship: raising your prices, selling a product for the first time, writing your first book/newsletter, quitting your 9-5 job and starting for yourself, having a “monsterboard moment” (when going back to prison, I mean to a 9-5 job) appears appealing….
Panic plays with time. When we’re going through it, it appears eternal. The duration of my panic threshold during birthing was just 20, yes TWENTY minutes! Look back and remember when you’ve been afraid. Notice how the time appeared to expand when you were in fear. Notice how, in perspective, it was nothing you couldn’t handle.
Panic also plays in time in a different way. It takes you out of what is happening NOW, right now. It either takes you to the future (I won’t be able to sustain this situation in the future) or to the past (I don’t want this to go as wrong as it did last time).
In general, there are two ideas how to deal with fear: to face it or to deny it. I don’t recommend either of them. To face your fear desensitizes you. It makes you get used to it. We are not in this world to go through life as victims of our circumstances. We’re here as actors, as change agents, builders! Do not accept feeling out of sync. Don’t accept to feel afraid. You are here to shine and transform the world, not to comply and accept the status quo.
To deny your fear is also a very bad idea. When you act even if you feel fear, tension controls you. The possibility of your fear materializing goes to the roof! Even more, we don’t get any joy, nor benefit from any action we take in that state of mind.
My advice is in the middle road: “Park your Fear” and come back to the NOW. See your fear as a cloud. It is. It’s a temporary situation outside of your control. After parking it, you can take action. You can observe what is really happening now, right now and chose a different way of acting.
During my corporate life, I used to believe in independence and that asking for help was a sign of weakness. I used to experience fear quite often (rashes, heartburn, insomnia…), of course without accepting it. Now, I’ve learned that the best investment you can do in your own development is to ask for help, ask for relevant and visionary help. When you surround yourself with an environment of support and respect, you will move through the path of least resistance, you’ll create change and innovation through joy. Make sure you engage a mentor that challenges you and inspires you. Make sure you are surrounded by other heart centered entrepreneurs who would remind you that “good, feels good”. Make sure, your closest relationships are also your closest support system.
Remember, good feels good. Don’t move forward in fear. First, come back to the now, align yourself with how harmonious life is, and then just then take action. Good thoughts to come back to the now are “I cannot see how harmonious life is right now, but I will soon understand how perfect they are”, “I cannot see all, but ultimately things always work out for me”,
First align with the divine perfection of life and then just then take action.
PS. The end of my panic threshold was accelerated by the decisive and relevant words of my mentor (the best midwife in the world!). Then I regained my power, my concentration and my awareness. So I started helping my baby’s way out. After TEN minutes, he was with us. Amazing? I guess that’s the power of being in the now.